christ

everybody's bummed and i'm an ass;
i don't mean to be crass but
i guess at least everyone's lost their shit together -
pun intended.
everyone i've befriended
is depressed,
making best-dressed,
most-popular, locally-famous lists
and not giving a fuck.
what happened to happy?
i don't know where it went
and i'm the worst they could have sent
to find it again.
my throat hurts and my back aches
and school's just started and i'm searching for breaks
so soon;
loading my pills on a spoon
and swallowing down all the sanity i can get.
(haven't grown much yet.)
sowing my seeds when my head's not pounding
but it only feeds the feeling of drowning
in all the big fat fucking nothing.
what happened to happy?
swallow your pills.