a 6:17am revelation... of sorts

i know that somewhere, deep down, you want what's best for me.
and i know that you're just a little confused
as to what that is right now.

i don't blame you;
up until now, "what's best" has always been what you want.
and i appreciate you wanting the right things for me.

but this time it's what i want.
i know it is.
i promise.

and i think you know it too,
somewhere inside you.

this isn't supposed to be resentful,
this isn't supposed to be a fight.
but if it has to be, i will make it so.
(just as you have taught me to do.)

i know you don't want this right now, mom.
but i know this is right.
so please want it too,
for me.