i never have plans. i've told you before - i would need friends for that.
and i don't have friends.
especially not from back then.
which is why it's so disappointing that when someone out there does actually want to see me,
you won't allow me to have them here.
i'm not mad; it's your house and you were clear from the beginning.
to be honest, i didn't anticipate it being an issue -
i don't have friends.
well, maybe one. but i've got no place to house her,
so how can i possibly ask her to still make that trip?
for me.
and i'll have a place soon, yeah -
when summertime is over, and the opportunity has passed.
i suppose there's always next year.
but in all honesty, i'm just not sure
that i can go that long without some shred of contact that will keep us connected.
how long can you go not seeing someone, declining offers to change that,
before your chances run out?
i'll bet not much, for me.
i'm not mad; there's nothing i can do.
it is what it is, and all that.
i was surprised, this year,
to find that people still thought of me.
a year from now, though, next summer -
no surprises then, i bet.
where i thought i'd be this year,
just one year too late.
7.28.2015
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